Important Announcement! Exclusive To 10/tenths! American Talent Seeks Williams Seat!

[Fish_Flake]

I was hoping to keep this a secret, but with the recent allegations about Mika Hakkinen and Jacques Villeneuve coming to light, and all the speculation involving just about every racing driver on the planet, there is no advantage of keeping a low profile. I, Fish_Flake, am putting my hat in the ring to earn a seat in the Williams for the 2005 Formula 1 championship. It appears to be a cut-throat battle for those two rides, and I'm looking to be right into the middle of it.

I know what you're thinking. You have no experience or financial backing; why would Williams select you to drive one of their cars? To answer that question, I mention one word: upside. I am an absolute novice in racing: my mind isn't corrupted with my own opinions of how racing should be. I'm a clean slate, and the BMW-Williams F1 team can mold me into whatever they want me to be. I'm 18, 5'10", 175 pounds, and willing to work with the world's greatest physical trainers to transform into the leanest, hungriest young talent in F1 today.

What does experience bring, anyway? A race car driver these days is like a collectible Star Wars figurine: once it's out of its original packaging, it has no value anymore. Who needs Hakkinen or Villeneuve? They're ancient! There's no use for a former World Champion; you might as well pump them all with formaldehyde and prop them up in a museum exhibit. Scott Dixon? Considering how many laps are in an IRL event, he can't have too many fast ones left in him. Mark Webber? This guy's too nice to be a winner. Nick Heidfeld? No F3000 champion has ever translated that into an F1 title; why expect that to change? Clearly, I am the best option available. Even better, I demand nothing for my services. If you don't want to pay me anything, that's fine with me. The ball's in your table now, Williams: how do you wish to play it?

[james_williams]

I'd give him the job!

[Knowlesy]

The most credible rumour so far!

[Testure]

Genius, matey, pure genius

[Fish_Flake]

When I woke up this morning to a Hakkinen rumor mill, I thought to myself, this whole Williams thing is getting ridiculous. I need to do something to point out the completely ludicrous speculation that has been spreading around in racing circles over the past several weeks.

[Knowlesy]

I must admit the Williams thing is getting on my nerves now. I found it amusing for a while, but now it's getting tedious. And I mean REALLY tedious.

Why can't they all be merged or something anyways?

Only a matter of time until another Villeneuve thread opens. Oh no, it's Hakkinen now. Silly me.

Only 5 more months of this.........

[ElScOrChO]

Good luck fish! I'm applying to the job too!
with my 5'2" 120pounds, they can adjust the ballast
more efficiently so we get a better car balance!

[Super Tourer]

I've heard Alan Jones is on the list......and where is Keke's number.....

[Bononi]

Well, ladies and gents...

******* FISH_FLAKE : WILLIAMS DRIVER 2005 !!!! *******

You heard here first !

And better : We're going to have exclusive insights from our new star, ONLY here at Ten-Tenths !!!!

[Fish_Flake]

Now, now. Formal procedures must be followed. I will be calling a press conference at 3:15 PM Eastern Daylight Savings Time (that's 9:15 Greenwich Mean Time). Members of the press will be allowed to present any and all questions regarding my decision.

[ralf fan]

Hey Hey, am i late.... i want to sign in...

Oh well i guess im late... Fish can offer more NOTHING than i ever could... right choice Patrick...

[ElScOrChO]

There is now a rumor saying that Fish_Flake has been seen at the Williams factory. A test drive is to be done in Monza the week after the Canadian Grand Prix.

[Fish_Flake]

OK, sorry to keep you waiting, but allow me to give an update on the situation and straighten out the media's rumors that have begun to circulate.
Tomorrow, I will spend the day at the Six Flags Over Georgia theme park, using the roller coasters and other thrill rides to train myself for the G-forces that the car will generate. Then, when the Formula 1 circus travels to this side of the pond after the Nurburgring, Williams will ship one FW26 and a small group of team engineers to Road Atlanta to meet me for a test. I guarantee that I will set the lap record for F1 cars at the circuit during the test. After that, the team will decide whether or not to invite me back to Europe upon the conclusion of the United States GP. Any questions?

[Knowlesy]

Originally posted by Fish_Flake
.....Road Atlanta to meet me for a test. I guarantee that I will set the lap record for F1 cars at the circuit during the test.

Yes. I wonder why?

[Skam85]

[james_williams]

Fish,

Can I be your number 2 driver?

[DriverT]

Are you sure the seat will fit you? Is Trust your sponsor?

[fog_shadow]

just keep of the pit babes. they're mine.

[climb]

Fish, ya need a manager?

[Skam85]

Sounds like you've been playing a bit too much F1 Career Challenge eh Fish?