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18 Oct 2011, 18:58 (Ref:2973446) | #1 | |
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You know you're obsessed with F1 when..
Just a bit of fun, mostly nicked from elsewhere. I've added some of my own.
You know you’re obsessed with Formula 1 when: • You can explain the Lotus naming dispute and make sense of it. • You take the racing line under any circumstances, such as walking up a staircase. • You stop in front of the house and expect the mechanics to push you into the garage. • Your girlfriend says she is going to the spa, and the first thing that pops into your mind is her sitting in a McLaren and flooring it through Eau Rouge. • After winning a game of tennis, the Vettel index finger is now a part of your celebration. • A simple trip karting becomes more and more like an onboard lap of Senna at Monaco every time you remember it. • You make massive amounts of pointless spreadsheets to store stats that are readily accessible on the internet. • Halfway on your walk to work, you stop and change your shoes. • An old man is stuck at 40mph and you can't pass him, so you start shouting "I.. am.. faster.. than.. you!”. • You try to replicate a real-life situation on an F1 video game. • You talk through laps on F1 2010 like you're Martin Brundle explaining it to the world. • You describe your underwear colour as 'British Racing Green'. • You nicknamed your dad's BMW 'Robert'. • You know that rallying driving style is better for a shopping trolley than Formula 1 driving style. • You hear ‘Red Bull’ and the first thing that comes to your mind is the racing team, not the energy drink brand. • You joke about deploying DRS when trying to overtake on the dual carriageway. • You actually forget that you don’t have DRS when trying to overtake. • Whilst cycling in the rain, you put a flashing rear light on "Because that’s what they do in F1". • You reach a petrol station, and hope to be out of there within 9 seconds, and hopefully without a fuel nozzle jammed into your car. • You are walking behind someone, you wait until the last millisecond to cut either to the left, or the right, and then try to overtake them. • You watch old YouTube clips of F1 and you know exactly what Murray Walker is going to say and how he says it. • A friend starts discussing where they want to go on holiday and you start prattling on about the tracks the country has. • On a night out, when you're asked if you want another glass of wine you start rambling on about Jarno Trulli. • While drinking champagne, you are sometimes tempted to either spray it out on everyone, or at least pour it out over the friends next to you. • You slip over, and immediately blame Charlie Whiting for starting the day in these conditions. • You use F1 situations as metaphors. In my not-so-wise moments, when a friend has needed advice I have compared it to Suzuka 1990, Senna VS Prost. • It rains and you step in puddles to cool down your shoes. • Your dad gets a haircut, and the first thing you say is "You look like Christian Horner”. • Your knowledge of foreign languages is heavily based on various corner names from around the world. • Any time you hear other people talking about F1 and getting their facts wrong you get consumed by an intolerable rage. • You were used as entertainment by your parents when you were young by having to recite all the world champions in order during dinner parties. • A guy tells you he’s a Schumi fan and that he started watching during the Ferrari years and you think he’s an F1 rookie. • You hear the German national anthem and you instinctively expect the Italian one to follow. • 90% of your conversations with your dad are about F1. • You wake up at 3.30am to watch Australian GP practice. • Your preferred choice of words for ‘definitely’ or ‘probably’ are ‘for sure’. • Before a race weekend, you get on the nearest F1 game and drive some laps to get into the swing of things. • After qualifying, you get on an F1 game again to show Vettel how it's done. • You take the racing line for walking and get annoyed when somebody gets in the way, so much so that you consider reporting them to the FIA. • If you miss anything, even a few minutes of the BBC Forum or The Chain, you are unhappy. • You slightly drive over one of those rumble strips on the motorway and the sound it makes reminds you of a kerb in a Formula 1 onboard shot. • You get stuck in fairly slow traffic and impersonate a member of your team telling you to go into fuel-saving mode “Okay <insert your name>, we need to go into fuel-saving mode. Mix 5, Mix 5”. |
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18 Oct 2011, 19:08 (Ref:2973453) | #2 | |
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So how many of these apply to you?
I counted 27 out of 42. |
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18 Oct 2011, 19:47 (Ref:2973473) | #3 | |
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18 Oct 2011, 19:48 (Ref:2973475) | #4 | ||
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Er... some of those are embarassing familiar...
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Show me a man who won't give it to his woman An' I'll show you somebody who will |
18 Oct 2011, 19:52 (Ref:2973480) | #5 | |
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Please feel free to add your own.
Another that occurred to me after a bath just now: • You put both hands on either side of the bath to pull yourself out of it and are reminded of an F1 driver exiting the cockpit. |
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18 Oct 2011, 20:01 (Ref:2973485) | #6 | ||
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You know you are obsessed when:
I should sstop there for now! |
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18 Oct 2011, 20:13 (Ref:2973491) | #7 | ||
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it would be odd if there was no overlap of the 15 and 27. Then between you we'd have some superfan.
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Seriously not taking motorsport too seriously. |
18 Oct 2011, 20:25 (Ref:2973499) | #8 | ||
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who doesnt take the racing line up stairways? i even do a hamilton if im going up a stairway side by side and turn in without checking my mirrors!
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never eat belly button fluff |
18 Oct 2011, 20:28 (Ref:2973500) | #9 | ||
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I ran away and tried to delete the fact this ever appeared on my computer! Deary me
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18 Oct 2011, 20:33 (Ref:2973501) | #10 | |
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Please, call me dye. |
18 Oct 2011, 20:40 (Ref:2973503) | #11 | |
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I suppose a logical one is when you use a forum about it.
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18 Oct 2011, 20:58 (Ref:2973511) | #12 | ||
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No, the logical one is when you read every bloody line of the post
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18 Oct 2011, 21:24 (Ref:2973521) | #13 | ||
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20/42.
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18 Oct 2011, 21:32 (Ref:2973525) | #14 | ||
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When stopped at traffic lights, you think to yourself: "Look... but never stare".
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I can't drive 55. |
18 Oct 2011, 22:17 (Ref:2973547) | #15 | |
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Sometimes I use the 'heel-and-toe' method of typing. Does that count?
My car has a 'flappy-paddle' gear change, and sometimes..................oh this is so sad! |
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18 Oct 2011, 23:25 (Ref:2973583) | #16 | |
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Giving your girlfriend a lift to work, you ask her to impersonate your calm race engineer saying "Understood. We're looking into it" etc, because you find race engineer delivery funny, and in order to give you an opportunity to answer back on the fictional radio and generally pretend you're in a Grand Prix.
Now where did I leave my coat? (I've only done that once- it was today!) Last edited by Born Racer; 18 Oct 2011 at 23:31. |
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19 Oct 2011, 00:56 (Ref:2973612) | #17 | ||
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When you can watch a wing flap open and close and pretend it's racing your watching..
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19 Oct 2011, 01:43 (Ref:2973625) | #18 | ||
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When you live/drive in the city of Adelaide & still refer to the streets by their 'racing' name........Every time I sit at the lights of Jones & Brabham Straights, I picture an endless stream of 80s/90s F1 cars taking Brewery Bend at 180kph+..........in 4th gear.......(oh dear).
I also occasionally think of Mika & think how lucky he is to be alive! . |
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19 Oct 2011, 02:56 (Ref:2973644) | #19 | |
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You refer to traffic islands as chicanes.
You talk about picking up the slipstream to overtake on the motorway. It is not! It is called 'tailgating'! |
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19 Oct 2011, 06:05 (Ref:2973674) | #20 | ||
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You commentate yourself - both to live F1 and everyday while you're slipstreaming traffic.
You spend long amounts of time explaining and teaching F1 to people who aren't remotely interested, especially you're partner. And she knows just to shut up and listen until the speech/teaching/rant is over. You refer to public roads as 'the track', and regular routes are 'laps'. |
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19 Oct 2011, 06:40 (Ref:2973679) | #21 | ||
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"A lot of people go through life doing things badly. Racing’s important to men who do it well. When you’re racing, it... it’s life. Anything that happens before or after... is just waiting." - Steve McQueen |
19 Oct 2011, 06:58 (Ref:2973683) | #22 | ||
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Wow to many, especially the one about getting angrry when someone gets knowlege about motorsports in general wrong. LOL.
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Brendon Hartley, Chris van der Drift, Mitch Evans, Richie Stanaway (and maybe) Nick Cassidy. New Zealand's F1 future! |
19 Oct 2011, 09:37 (Ref:2973742) | #23 | ||
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A depressing 29/42 of there. Eugh, I need to get out more.
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19 Oct 2011, 09:45 (Ref:2973744) | #24 | |
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devils advocate in-chief and professional arguer of both sides |
19 Oct 2011, 12:17 (Ref:2973798) | #25 | |
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There are moments when forum's like this one confirm your sanity - I am not alone in doing these things, so it must be okay!!
Always taking the racing line is one thing. Being followed by a work collegue while on the way in one morning and have it commented on when we both get there is another. |
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