Poetry for Marshals

[bauble]

A sprightly young marshal called Keith,
Told the Chief he needed relief,
Said the chief with a hiss;
"Are you taking the...........
Son you'll just have grit all your teeth.

[bauble]

A grey haired old marshal named Clive
Threw a party where the music was live,
It attracted a crowd,
For the music was LOUD,
Wish I'd left before I arrived!

[bauble]

When the time comes to take a break on a post,
Of the attributes some marshal's may boast.
Now dear Snozwangler,
Was proud of his dangler,
As he reckoned it was bigger than most.

[snoz wanger]

Its Wanger.........donger

[bauble]

Originally Posted by snoz wanger

Its Wanger.........donger

I must have been thinking of someone else

Bob that aged old snapper wrote verse
With rhymes that were frankly perverse.
With Snoz he caused such anger,
When he really met wanger,
Who dangler had caused so much mirth.

[snoz wanger]

Originally Posted by bauble

I must have been thinking of someone else

Bob that aged old snapper wrote verse
With rhymes that were frankly perverse.
With Snoz he caused such anger,
When he really met wanger,
Who dangler had caused so much mirth.

Brilliant......

[MagnetON]

MagnetOn was a marshal from Nantuckett.......

[snoz wanger]

There once was a marshal called Blunt.
Who'd attended far more than one shunt.
While out with his bottle.
sorting those on full throttle.
He tripped over and felt like he should
really have considered doing a risk assessment before carrying out such tasks....

[m1fcf]

Originally Posted by MagnetON

MagnetOn was a marshal from Nantuckett.......

Into his boot, his Wanger, could tuck it....

[bauble]

Originally Posted by m1fcf

Into his boot, his Wanger, could tuck it....

It often turned blue,
and it just had to do,
................... When all he could find was a bucket.
......................... ?

[Middle_BBG]

Just goes to prove that most of use are, poetically speaking, dirty limericks !

[bauble]

Originally Posted by Middle_BBG

Just goes to prove that most of use are, poetically speaking, dirty limericks !

Who are you calling a Dirty Limerick?

[bauble]

Now BBG was only a rookie, and from his post he often played hookey
He'd come back all spent, and when asked where he went,
Replied I just nipped back for some nookie.

I find making up poems quite easy, in fact I would say easy peasy.
Some might sound risky and some make you frisky,
And some are just plain downright sleazy.

[Johansen2000]

Lol these poems have just made my day!! Made me giggle a lot!

Shame I have all the poetry skills of squashed Silverstone hare otherwise I would join in!!

[bauble]

Originally Posted by Johansen2000

Lol these poems have just made my day!! Made me giggle a lot!

Shame I have all the poetry skills of squashed Silverstone hare otherwise I would join in!!

This one is for you Johan.

An Incident Explained
My mother was a marshal as good as any man,
She had arms like tree trunks and a deep brown leather tan.
One time she was on duty at the Brit GP,
While Dad and I stayed back at home and watched it on TV.
Mothers post was down at Stowe, the bottom of the straight,
When the leader came in sight and left it late to brake.
At that point the blighter’s race really did unravel,
Midst clouds of smoke the silly bloke went deep in to the gravel.

There at home we plainly saw Mum was quickly on the scene,
What happened next was there to see upon the TV screen.
She told the driver please get out we’re in an awful rush,
He wouldn’t move and shouted out; “Come on give me a push”
Well as you can tell as well as I that wasn’t going to work.
So Mum reached in and pulled him out with just one savage jerk.
Of course he wasn’t very pleased, and at our Mum he swore,
Well she looked mad, and my dad said” I’ve seen that look before.”

The driver rather foolishly tried to climb back in his car,
But with Mother’s hand around his neck he didn’t get too far.
Well the word he used to remonstrate were just not fit to hear.
I know if had said such things I’d have copped one round the ear.
Our Mum wouldn’t stand for that and gave the chap a clout,
And even with his helmet on she knocked the bugger out.
The Post Chief looked up at her and said you’ve really done it petal,
We’re on TV for all to see, you decked Sebastian Vettel!

[Johansen2000]

Love it!!!!!!!!!! You should right a book of motorsport poetry!!

[Woolley]

Originally Posted by Middle_BBG

dirty limericks !

Nah, the Magnet's in Dublin

[bauble]

I thought this might spur a few of the more erudite amongst you to demonstrate their ability as poets, however, it seems that talent is sadly lacking.
Therefore I will finish with just one more verse, and leave it there.

If (With apologies to Rudyard Kipling)

If you can rise at Sparrows Fart, and drive forty miles or more
Spend eight hours on the bank when the weather’s cold and raw
If you can stand up to your knees in mud and never once complain,
Yet tell yourself that this is fun despite the freezing rain.
If your lunch is thermos tea, pork pies and sausage dogs,
And your post is one of those that’s furthest from the bogs.
If you can do all this and more then come back next week again.
Then you’ll be marshal my son – and probably insane.

[icorper]

Brilliant

[bauble]

Originally Posted by icorper

Brilliant

Thank you i, compliments are always welcome.

Cheers,

Bob.

[Woolley]

Lonely little marshal, feeling hot and smelly.
Wondering why not go inside and watch it on the telly?

(With apologies to Spike Milligan)

[bauble]

Originally Posted by Woolley

Lonely little marshal, feeling hot and smelly.
Wondering why not go inside and watch it on the telly?

(With apologies to Spike Milligan)

Well! It's a start ............................ I suppose.

But to tell the truth, I'm not impressed by the prose.

[bauble]

Oop's! My post was so nice,
It seems I tried to post it twice.
I must be in love, so just blame cupid.
Of I could just be ...........................?

Now what can I rhyme with Cupid?

[Greem]

Originally Posted by Woolley

Lonely little marshal, feeling hot and smelly.
Wondering why not go inside and watch it on the telly?

(With apologies to Spike Milligan)

On the Ning Nang Nong
Where the Cars go Bong!
and the flaggies all say BOO!

There's a Nong Nang Ning
Where the bikes go Ping!
And the post chiefs jibber jabber joo.

On the Nong Ning Nang
The IOs go Clang
And you just can't catch 'em when they do!

So its Ning Nang Nong
Cars go Bong!
Nong Nang Ning
Bikes go ping
Nong Ning Nang
IOs go Clang

What a noisy place to belong
is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!!

(I'll get me coat)

[bauble]

(I'll get me coat)[/QUOTE]

Yeah! and I'll help you on with it.