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Most excellent, a thread where we can passive-aggressively push our agendas on drivers we don't like!
Lewis Hamilton. Everyone else sucks. No one is as good as the GOAT! Why bother turning up?
Sebastian Vettel. Ferrari do team orders so nobody will be allowed to race the chosen German in the team. Kimi may as well not turn up.
Max Verstappen. Red Bull want the youngest WDC, Danny Ricc may as well not show up.
Sergio Perez. Perez will win because Toto Wolff doesn't want to promote somebody that will challenge Lewis again, we all know how that turned out last time. Ocon should just stay at home.
Lance Stroll. Both suck and Kubica should have gotten the drive. Stroll because he's had an extra year in F1, but neither should really bother showing up.
Nico Hulkenberg Hulk will win this because Christian Horner and co don't want to have to have another driver at RBR that will challenge Max once Danny Ricc leaves, Sainz may as well stay home for a year.
Pierre Gasly Gasly will win so Christian Horner and co can choose the weaker Hartley for the RBR drive in 2019. He may as well not even bother.
Kevin Magnussen Both drivers are underwhelming but at least Kev doesn't complain about everything. Save yourself the effort and stay at home Romain.
Fernando Alonso Fernando is overrated but McLaren don't want everyone to see that and will let him beat Stoffel, who should just save his effort.
Charles Leclerc Because why should Ericsson hold his own and end the career of a third promising young driver in as many years? Don't even bother.
In all seriousness though, Hamilton, Vettel, Ricciardo, Ocon, Stroll, Hulk, Gasly, Grosjean, Alonso, Leclerc
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