Bell's Banter 2021

[bauble]

Originally Posted by terence

They would never have gotten away with those names these days.

Yet four letter words are quite common place in todays TV offerings, it's funny, what offends some people.

[delta]

Yes. Only a fool would be out on a night like this. !!!! knock knock knock " let me in let me in ". Happy days.

[Peter Mallett]

What about I'm Sorry Ì'll Read That Again. Theme song written by Eric Idle.

[midgetman]

Originally Posted by The Fat Clerk

And of course Seaman Stains

Ahem. Post 763 above refers, which is where the Carrot memories started.....

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[midgetman]

Originally Posted by terence

They would never have gotten away with those names these days.

They didn't in those days. It was a Jasper Carrot parody sketch, not produced for TV.......but it was so popular that it's gone into folklore. A bit like Max Bygraves never saying "I wanna tell you a story."

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[VIVA GT]

Originally Posted by Peter Mallett

What about I'm Sorry Ì'll Read That Again. Theme song written by Eric Idle.

What "The Angus Prune Tune"? (I always assumed that would have been written by Bill Oddie who used to provide the musical aspects of ISIRTA)

[S griffin]

You would have to be very careful what you say in comedy nowadays, especially if it was to a big audience. There’s still room for some great comedy and there’s always old ones to fall back on, if you can find it

[Peter Mallett]

Originally Posted by VIVA GT

What "The Angus Prune Tune"? (I always assumed that would have been written by Bill Oddie who used to provide the musical aspects of ISIRTA)

I read it on Twitter so I may be mistaken.

[MGDavid]

Originally Posted by The Fat Clerk

And of course Seaman Stains

nothing wrong with that. When I first worked for Siemens in the late 90's we actually had a sizeable office in Staines and it was de rigeur to tell any new girls on the switchboard to answer with 'Siemens Staines, how may I help you?'
<deadpan>

[MGDavid]

Originally Posted by midgetman

Those were the characters. I also used to enjoy his "Magic Roundabout" parody, which pushed his "Funky Moped" disc to #1 because it was the B side. "Funky Moped" was mildly humourous, but nobody bought the record for that

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and then there was the Rainbow staff christmas edition - poor video but it's all about the soundtrack anyway...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgbcQIT7BMc

[S griffin]

That was great! Shame about the video, but wow, what a song to sing!

[grantp]

Originally Posted by Mike Harte

Grant, I think that you, or somebody else on here, brought up the matter of the Stanstead defendants, but as I think that I responded, the judges unanimously decided that they had been charged under the wrong legislation, a piece of law that was intended to cover something like a terrorist attack. They all agree that they broke the law, but not the law under which they were charged and subsequently found guilty of by a jury. This was an error caused by the prosecutors using the wrong legislation; if they had used the correct act of law the judges said, then the convictions, assuming they were still found guilty, would have stood.

One might wonder of the wrong law was a deliberate decision.

Many years ago I and a colleague were on a training course at a hotel in north London. We travelled in his company Maestro complete with some Company logos. On the second day some lowlife wandered into the hotel through the back doors that were open due to so refurb work, went up a staircase and kicked in a few doors. On of which was the room my colleague had been allocated.

Being a cautious person he had hidden the car keys in his washbag. The door kicker immediately found them,complete with corporate branded key fob. The car was parked outside on the road - the carpark was given over to the building work.

Reprobate was smart and spotted the connection, opened the car and drove off, watched by staff who reported the incident to the police.

Some days later the police made contact to say they apprehended the thief as he was attempting to throw away the keys for the car. Colleague lost some expensive driving gloves, sunglasses and a few other things that he could not prove were his when the thief claimed ownership.

Taken to court he was charged with receiving stolen goods. At which point he said he could not possibly have received them as he had stolen them.

Let off with a small fine that, reportedly, he paid peeling some large notes from a wad in his back pocket. Less than the value of the personal property.

It seems the law has long been just a game.

[grantp]

Originally Posted by crmalcolm

To drive your car to a plane-spotting point, you will inevitably need fuel for the journey. Filling up your car is a potential place to spread the virus.

Many cars each year need breakdown assistance. That involves someone from a breakdown firm, or another household, to come to your aid. Another way to spread the virus.

Sadly, many drivers are also involved in accidents each year. If only for repairs, your car will go into a workshop. If you need assistance following the accident, you will be interacting with emergency services. More ways you could spread the virus.

And if you unfortunately end up with the need for medical assistance, you will be diverting resources away from other priorities, including handling COVID patients. Oh, and guess what, you're also increasing the likelihood of spreading the virus into a medical establishment at this point.

How do we avoid this unnecessary drain on resource, and potential spread of the virus? Don't drive your car to carry out an unnecessary activity!!

That is the theory as presented.


Does it REALLY stand up to logical consideration?


If it does and the vaccine becomes as intimated, an annual development battle, then can we expect all non-essential activities to be banned for at least the next decade?


I think the greater risk of having an accident is that you might well end up in Hospital somewhere, possibly far from "home", where , like Colonel Tom, infections can be readily obtained.


A few weeks ago a lad was stabbed in Leicester near his home. For treatment the medical services took him to Nottingham. 30 odd miles away. Presumably they had their reasons but one has to wonder about such a decision and the rationale behind it.

[andy97]

I am too young to remember “The Navy Lark”, instead I decided to live it!
Double entendre’s, black humour and generally taking the “P”out of each other is what often got us through.
If someone was being nice to you, then was the time to worry, hence the phrase, “beware the pat on the back, it is just the recce for the knife!”

[grantp]

Originally Posted by andy97

I am too young to remember “The Navy Lark”, instead I decided to live it!
Double entendre’s, black humour and generally taking the “P”out of each other is what often got us through.
If someone was being nice to you, then was the time to worry, hence the phrase, “beware the pat on the back, it is just the recce for the knife!”

Sorry Andy, I think the type of humour you mentioned above is now on the bl...., er, the banned list.

[andy97]

Originally Posted by grantp

Sorry Andy, I think the type of humour you mentioned above is now on the bl...., er, the banned list.

Maybe, but somehow I doubt it!

[andy97]

Originally Posted by E.B

I sent him an email before asking the same question and hoping he is well. I will report back if I hear from him.

E.B. - did you hear back from Gerard?
I sent him a text this evening but not had a reply yet.

[bauble]

Originally Posted by andy97

E.B. - did you hear back from Gerard?
I sent him a text this evening but not had a reply yet.

Me neither.

[GORDON STREETER]

Originally Posted by bauble

Me neither.

Last post 29th January.

[E.B]

Originally Posted by andy97

E.B. - did you hear back from Gerard?
I sent him a text this evening but not had a reply yet.

Nothing at all as yet received by me.

Originally Posted by GORDON STREETER

Last post 29th January.

Yes indeed and that was the reason for my concern. However I looked on his profile and it shows activity (ie he logged in) on his account most recently here at 00:51(am) on the 8/2/21 so not so scary.
It is just a bit unlike Gerard to have nothing to say for so long.(from 29th to now, particularly in the puzzles threat.)

Very worrying.

[VIVA GT]

Sorry gang. I sent Gerard a PM at the weekend to check that he was OK and got a reply to he was fine, so have to assume that he's just feeling a bit quiet at the moment.

[bauble]

Originally Posted by VIVA GT

Sorry gang. I sent Gerard a PM at the weekend to check that he was OK and got a reply to he was fine, so have to assume that he's just feeling a bit quiet at the moment.

Well GerryMo if you do log on, remember, you have a lot of friends here, who care about you, and are concerned for your well being. Hurry back, we, miss your Froggy ramblings, and humour.

ia vai hau noa.

[zefarelly]

He hasn't been banned for being a 'foreigner' then ?

[E.B]

Originally Posted by VIVA GT

Sorry gang. I sent Gerard a PM at the weekend to check that he was OK and got a reply to he was fine, so have to assume that he's just feeling a bit quiet at the moment.

Thanks for letting us know, and good to hear all is good with him, and he has not been sent to the guillotine.
I was getting a bit worried.... easily done in the present climate.

[andy97]

I, too, have had a text back from Gerard and he is touched we are concerned. Says he will post tonight but i got impression may not have been well.