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7 Jul 2020, 12:11 (Ref:3986472) | #2101 | |||
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Quote:
How do you get 2 whales in a Mini? Down the A5 How do you find out how heavy a whale is? Take it to a whale-weigh station. |
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Incognito: An Italian phrase meaning Nice Gearchange! |
7 Jul 2020, 14:15 (Ref:3986505) | #2102 | ||
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When asking; "Is he joking?" Best assume yes! |
7 Jul 2020, 14:20 (Ref:3986506) | #2103 | ||
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Thanks for all the jokes. They have come in very useful for cheering-up a friend who is in hospital!
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7 Jul 2020, 14:36 (Ref:3986510) | #2104 | ||
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Born in the Midlands, made in the Royal Navy |
7 Jul 2020, 14:44 (Ref:3986513) | #2105 | ||
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Im sure we all know the difference between a buffalo and a bison....?
You cant wash your hands in a buffalo. |
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7 Jul 2020, 14:52 (Ref:3986519) | #2106 | ||
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7 Jul 2020, 15:01 (Ref:3986523) | #2107 | |
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How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but the lightbulb has to want to change |
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He who dares wins! He who hesitates is lost! |
7 Jul 2020, 15:19 (Ref:3986542) | #2108 | ||
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Why does it take six women with Post natal depression to change a light bulb?
It just does. Alright!!! |
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When asking; "Is he joking?" Best assume yes! |
7 Jul 2020, 16:20 (Ref:3986559) | #2109 | ||
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How about a Scottish joke for those of a certain age:
What's the difference between Bing Crosby & Walt Disney? Well, Bing Sings but Walt Disney. Not Scottish but connected: I went to the doctors the other day and told him I was dreaming in cartoons. He reassured me that it was nothing to worry about, I was just having a few disney spells. |
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Incognito: An Italian phrase meaning Nice Gearchange! |
7 Jul 2020, 16:42 (Ref:3986563) | #2110 | ||
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7 Jul 2020, 16:44 (Ref:3986564) | #2111 | ||
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When asking; "Is he joking?" Best assume yes! |
7 Jul 2020, 17:11 (Ref:3986572) | #2112 | |
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Why are tennis players so bad at relationships?
Because love means nothing to them |
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He who dares wins! He who hesitates is lost! |
7 Jul 2020, 17:13 (Ref:3986575) | #2113 | ||
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I just want to thanks to MG David for popping in to Delta HQ for a cup of tea at 12.30.He finally left at 5pm after skimming my set of Atlantic slicks ready for Saturday at Brands. Top man.that Dave.
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7 Jul 2020, 18:00 (Ref:3986585) | #2114 | ||
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One for you Viva.
Whats the difference between a whale and my mother in law? Well, about ten pounds actually… |
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Celui qui est parti de rien pour arriver nulle part,n'a de merci a dire a personne.Pour ceux qui vont chercher midi a quatorze heures, la minute de Vérité risque de se faire attendre longtemps. |
7 Jul 2020, 19:39 (Ref:3986594) | #2115 | |
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You poke her face Who is the world’s fastest suit maker? Tailor Swift |
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He who dares wins! He who hesitates is lost! |
7 Jul 2020, 19:58 (Ref:3986598) | #2116 | |||
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Quote:
Meantime, why do elephants have red toenails? So they can hide in cherry trees. Have you ever seen etc?....... Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk |
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Midgetman - known as Max Tyler to the world. MaxAttaq! |
7 Jul 2020, 20:02 (Ref:3986600) | #2117 | ||
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You have 500 bricks. If you throw one off a plane, how many will you have left?
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7 Jul 2020, 20:32 (Ref:3986602) | #2118 | ||
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When asking; "Is he joking?" Best assume yes! |
7 Jul 2020, 21:04 (Ref:3986608) | #2119 | |
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10 sticks of dynamite sitting on a wall and if one stick of dynamite should accidentally fall....
There’ll be no sticks of dynamite and no flipping wall! |
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He who dares wins! He who hesitates is lost! |
7 Jul 2020, 22:02 (Ref:3986619) | #2120 | ||
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How far back can you go?
Why do firemen wear red braces? What is the difference between an elephant and post box? I don't know..... What do you call a dog with no legs? A man walked into a pub and asked "Who owns that Mastiff outside?" A burly drinker said "I do why?" Man. "Because my dog just killed it." Drinker. " What sort of dog do you have that can kill a Mastiff?" Man. "It's a poodle." Drinker. "How could your poodle kill my Mastiff?" Man "He got stuck in his throat." The dustman asked the Chinaman. Where's yer bin.? I bin Hong Kong. No where's yer wheelie bin? I weally bin Hong Kong. |
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When asking; "Is he joking?" Best assume yes! |
7 Jul 2020, 22:05 (Ref:3986621) | #2121 | ||
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I'm not going to send you our to post a letter, you might give it to an elephant.
Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk |
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Midgetman - known as Max Tyler to the world. MaxAttaq! |
8 Jul 2020, 07:14 (Ref:3986654) | #2122 | ||
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Just to start the day off...
What do you call a man wearing a raincoat? Mac. What do you call a man wearing two raincoats? Max. What do you call a man wearing two raincoats who lives near the cemetery? Max Bygraves! |
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Incognito: An Italian phrase meaning Nice Gearchange! |
8 Jul 2020, 07:29 (Ref:3986656) | #2123 | ||
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"When you’re just too socially awkward for real life, Ten-Tenths welcomes you with open arms. Everyone has me figured out, which makes it super easy for me." |
8 Jul 2020, 09:09 (Ref:3986668) | #2124 | |||
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Quote:
You could call him Marlboro and go for a drag in the park. |
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When asking; "Is he joking?" Best assume yes! |
8 Jul 2020, 09:31 (Ref:3986675) | #2125 | ||
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What's the most expensive fish you can buy?
A goldfish I'll get my coat |
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Comments made are personal and don't reflect any club or Motorsport UK policy. "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein |
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