Bell's Banter 2022

[Adam43]

Needs an Oxford comma that.

Just had a skim of the local DMV rule, think I’m OK here. Not that I have this feature!

[Peter Mallett]

Indeed it does. But old fashioned lawyers always left out punctuation. These days it's frowned apon.

[grantp]

Originally Posted by VIVA GT

I am now extra-careful with my car keys but still haven't made the sensible investment of getting a duplicate one 'Just-In-Case'!

I also try to avoid parking near drains. Just in case.

Carrying one of those extending magnet devices in the car (magnet on the end of what looks like an ancient car radio aerial - neatly tying 2 recent threads together ...) has always seemed like a good idea although I have never got around to putting one in each car.

[grantp]

Originally Posted by Peter Mallett

I concur. As much as I hate to admit it, if you can't use cash then try to use the mobile phone pay system. Apparently its more secure because you need to open the phone with facial or finger print recognition, and/or a pin. My Mach E, I discovered has an option to remotely unlock the doors if I walk past with the key in my pocket. I switched it off.

I saw a note from my bank (only when logged on via their app so one can see the "secure" messages) advising that any verification activity required when using online purchasing will in the future be done ONLY through the Phone App.

Given the last major re-write of the app meant it stopped working on the phone I had at the time, I assume the next major change will probably do the same thing. I await the banks requiring their own brand phones to be used if you want to access your own money.

Our Kia will start the unlock process if one gets within 3 or 4 feet of the car with a fob in one's pocket. However it does not actually unlock without a further action and will re-set if that action is not applied and/or the fob moves out of range. There is a delay of about 10 to 15 seconds.

Basically all it is doing is folding out the mirrors and putting on courtesy lights.

The problem is that the "4ft" range people perceive is something they then take to be the entire range of the fob. Thus they may assume that the fob could not be woken up by a signal of some sort from outside the house. A dangerous assumption in my opinion.

The "convenience" aspect of the fon may be short range but the main functionality via the buttons is somewhat longer range. And, of course via the App the range is, effectively, limitless.

[Mike Harte]

Grant, you mention your bank and it's phone app. My bank introduced a cash back system when using their debit and credit cards. However, they will only provide this if you apply for the cash back by using their phone app.

I, like, I expect, a lot of other people use my phone only for speaking to other people; everything else, I do via my laptop including the online banking website. Yes, I'm an old fart but doing things online is far easier than trying to do it on a relatively small phone screen. plus, of course, it has the advantage of having a full size keyboard and mouse, both wireless it goes without saying.

[Paul D]

Originally Posted by Peter Mallett

The key word is "parked". "You MUST NOT leave a parked vehicle unattended with the engine running or leave a vehicle engine running unnecessarily while that vehicle is stationary on a public road".

My interpretation of that would be that the last bit: "while that vehicle is stationary on a public road" applies to the whole statement and not just the second part, which would seem to suggest that you CAN leave a vehicle unattended with the engine running if it's not on a public road.

That's what I always understood the law to be anyway... probably been wrong all these years!

On the subject of lost car keys: I have a 1990s Land Cruiser which I've owned for years. During the first Covid lockdown back in 2020, after the Land Cruiser had been parked up for a while due to needing some work, I decided I was going to get it sorted during lockdown.

I only ever had one key for it, but when I came to move it into the workshop, it flatly refused to start. I tried everything, but couldn't get it to go. After much ado and lots of research online, I decided the problem had to be the key. Although the key has no battery, I discovered it does have a chip embedded in it - moulded into the plastic head of the key, no access to it nor any way to remove it or replace it. Apparently, even though there's no battery to power the chip, the car has some kind of proximity sensor in the ignition barrel that can scan the key and verify the presence of the correct chip - if it doesn't detect the chip, then no start.

After much head scratching, I finally convinced myself this had to be the problem by attempting to start the car the instant someone else connected the battery - when this was attempted, it would run for a few seconds before it cut out, whereas if any attempt was made to start it when the battery was already connected, there was nothing. This, I decided, had to be down to the fact that the fairly primitive ECU took a few seconds to 'boot-up' when first connected, and for those few seconds it would run, until it had time to decide it wasn't happy with the key, whereon it would shut down supply to the engine.

I tried a few local car locksmiths, who told me that it's very rare for this type of chip to fail, but it can happen. Sure enough, when they tested the key, their machines could detect no signal from the chip, suggesting that it was indeed dead. Unfortunately, their equipment couldn't help, as it only enabled them to copy an existing chip, so they could make me a spare key if I had a good one, but couldn't make one from a key with a dead chip.

It seemed I was running out of options. I didn't dare contact Toyota, for fear of a coronary-inducing result. Anecdotal evidence suggested a bill of £500+ for Toyota to sort it.

Then I remembered a guy who'd got a friend of mine going when the keys to his Citroen were stolen, and everyone else had failed him. Sure enough, this chap reckoned he could 'reverse engineer' a chip for the key from the car's own immobiliser control unit. So I sent him both the control unit and the key and, after a while, I got back in the post the original key & control unit, along with two (yes, I now have a spare!) new chips, programmed, he assured me, to my vehicle. Sure enough, once fitted, it fired up immediately. Disaster averted, and at a fraction of the cost of the alternative solutions. I have no idea how he did it, when other similar specialists couldn't manage it. Clearly a very clever chap with vehicle electronics.

The moral of the story? Get a spare key while you have a good one to copy! If you buy a car with only one key, and that key is the chipped type, then it's a lot simpler (and cheaper) to copy the existing good key than it is to get you going from scratch if you have no working key available.

[GORDON STREETER]

Originally Posted by Paul D

The moral of the story? Get a spare key while you have a good one to copy! If you buy a car with only one key, and that key is the chipped type, then it's a lot simpler (and cheaper) to copy the existing good key than it is to get you going from scratch if you have no working key available.

The easy cheapest way to get out of this sort of problem(especially if it's an old banger) and you only have one chipped key, is to get a key (or keys) cut by one of these cheap key cutters that do other things like shoe repairs etc (but of course it wont have a chip) and tape the chipped key to the ignition barrel out of sight. That way it will start without having to buy another chipped key

[midgetman]

Sometimes it pays to RTFI, even if you're a bloke.

I had a Peugeot 406 Estate that did not have the blipper key, just the chipped one. No problem, it just meant the alarm didn't set and I couldn't lock/open the door from afar.

All was good until I had to put a new battery on the car. On reconnecting it set the alarm and it triggered every time I opened the door. Without the blipper I couldn't reset the system and Peugeot quoted me well over £500 to supply a new blipper key.

Nothing for it, down to the scrappy and pick up a set of keys, locks and ECU. Hundred and fifty quid. Open my well thumbed Haynes manual to find out how to do it. "Step 1, press this button on the dashboard and it resets the alarm manually." I did that and my trusty original key worked perfectly. Always had wondered what the button did, had never bothered to find out before.

Like I said, always RTFI. Anyone need a set of 406 locks and ECU?

Sent from my AC2003 using Tapatalk

[Gerard C]

Originally Posted by midgetman

Like I said, always RTFI. Anyone need a set of 406 locks and ECU?

Who remembers the good ol'days when BMC cars had a spare key held with a simple screw on the front valance? No need to say you could open the bonnet from outside. Happy simple days!

[GORDON STREETER]

Originally Posted by midgetman

Sometimes it pays to RTFI, even if you're a bloke.





Like I said, always RTFI. Anyone need a set of 406 locks and ECU?

Sent from my AC2003 using Tapatalk

I might take you up on that, don't chuck them away as I will probably get them off you in the new year
I did know about the reset, however one of the major problems with the Pug 406 electrics are the multi plugs under the front carpets, they get damp for one reason or another and the contacts rust up and cause all sorts of problems.

[delta]

Funny you should mention that Gordon . My Citroen van had been playing up all year with engine light coming on and miss firing . Martin my old mechanic looked it and found multi plug damp . Been perfect now . Happy days .?

[GORDON STREETER]

Originally Posted by delta

Funny you should mention that Gordon . My Citroen van had been playing up all year with engine light coming on and miss firing . Martin my old mechanic looked it and found multi plug damp . Been perfect now . Happy days .?

It happens more now since canbus wiring came in, as everything is worked with very small voltage differences, so the system is more susceptible to problems with any dodgy connections to and from the ecu's
Anyway the Larkins Funeral went well with probably up to 500 people in attendance, and they didn't run out of beer or wine that was free to everyone

[Gerard C]

Originally Posted by delta

Funny you should mention that Gordon . My Citroen van had been playing up all year with engine light coming on and miss firing . Martin my old mechanic looked it and found multi plug damp.

Guess what? On some engines there are several……… coils!

[midgetman]

Originally Posted by GORDON STREETER

I might take you up on that, don't chuck them away as I will probably get them off you in the new year

.

Ah that'll teach me to be economical with the truth for comic effect.

In all honesty I sent them back and got a refund. Scrappy didn't want to do it at first as they'd supplied "the right one" and they "don't do refunds."

"Ah," said I, "you supplied a Mk 1 this is a Mark 2."

"We have a Mk 2 we'll swap it."

"Ah," I replied, making something up on the spot because I really wanted the cash back. "But I'll bet that's a late Mk 2, mine's half Coventry and half French because of all the strikes they had at the time."

"Ah yes," they replied reluctantly, "we heard about those hybrids. Here's your money"

Phew!

Sent from my AC2003 using Tapatalk

[Gerard C]

If you car, any brand, has an OBDII (from 2004 and onwards), its worth to buy an electronic device looking for any electronic fault. The simple models go for cheap now.