Ron Dennis: "Weatherman Clearly in Pay of Ferrari."

[Liz]

From www.imadethisup.com :

McLaren boss Ron Dennis told the press today that he has incontrovertable evidence that Ferrari, thought its agent the evil Jean Todt and in collusion with Bernie, have paid off the weatherman in a deliberate attempt to make the McLaren pilotes look stupid. "It's not fair," moaned Dennis to a rapidly dwindling audience, eventually made up only of Murray and Martin, who had bet heavily on Mikamikamikamikamika and were desperately trying to contact their bookies as the session wound to a close (the line was busy), "they PROMISED us we would ALWAYS win pole, no fair no fair no fair no fair Ferrariischeatingagainandnobodycares!" Mike and David could not be reached for comment, as they were sitting in the back of the garage, sniffling, and awaiting a shipment of Kleenex which had been bogged down in the mud.

"Meanwhile at Ferrari, Jean Todt is locked in the motorhome and we have rumours of loud banging noises and words in German that sound suspiciously like "Come out here and say that!" while Rubens speaks to the Italian Press, thanking them for publicizing the fact that Ferrari had screwed his car in the last race and making today's pole position possible.

"We will have a statement on the above from Eddie Jordan as soon as he can stop laughing."